


A Sea of Unstable

by small_town_girl



Category: Glee
Genre: Abuse, Brotherhood, Family, Gen, Protectiveness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-28
Updated: 2011-04-28
Packaged: 2017-10-18 18:25:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/191885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/small_town_girl/pseuds/small_town_girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the Glee Angst Meme: Kurt knows he and Rachel have a lot in common. So when he witnesses Rachel doing something that horrifies him, he can't help wondering if he's capable of doing the same one day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Sea of Unstable

Kurt really hated to admit it, even now that he was friends with Rachel, but he did have to concede that he shared a lot in common with the badly-dressed girl. They both adored their classic musicals, were both ignored by the majority of the student body, and when they weren’t ignored they were bullied. They both had crushed on the same guy, worse at the same time, and even worse pursued him while he was dating someone else.

He’d had plenty of time since then to analyze his behaviour back then and honestly, he was horrified with himself. He’d thought that Finn just hadn’t figured out those confusing feelings that would eventually lead him to admitting that he was gay but all he’d done was constantly tell Finn that girls were his problem instead of being a supportive friend. If someone had whispering ‘tell your dad’ in his ear when he was struggling with coming out to his dad, Kurt couldn’t be sure if would have done it. The comments definitely wouldn’t have made things any easier.

He and Rachel were also both very dramatic but in different ways. Kurt could admit he was a male diva. He liked being the centre of attention, he tended to get emotional, he definitely had a bitchy side to him, and well, anyone who’d seen his wardrobe knew he was a little spoiled by his dad. Some people might look at all that as a flaw but Kurt would rather embrace the diva label and wear it proudly next to a new Marc Jacobs scarf. And Rachel also wore her diva badge proudly, right over those ridiculous unicorns on her sweater.

It probably wasn’t too surprising that it took them so long to finally appreciate each other. The fact that they were so alike meant they kept rubbing each other the wrong way. Even now with being friends they still tended to have those fights that had everyone clearing the room so they wouldn’t end up as collateral damage.

With them being so alike, Kurt often wondered if his relationship with Blaine would follow Rachel’s relationship with Finn. He thought there were enough differences between him and Rachel so he’d be safe from wearing Team Blaine shirts any time soon.

Not that he was anywhere close to even going on a date with Blaine. But Rachel was friends with Finn before they started dating and she even mirrored him by wanting Finn throughout their friendship. It did give Kurt hope that Blaine would see how right they were for each other one day soon. And if Blaine ever did come to think of him that way, he wouldn’t cheat on him for spite and ruin their relationship.

Walking through the front door to find Finn studying with Rachel in the living room wasn’t shocking; they’d taken to after-school study sessions. The thing that had Kurt dropping his schoolbag and dropping his jaw was watching Rachel’s small hand come up from the textbook to slap Finn across the face as she demanded he pay attention. Even more disturbing to Kurt was seeing his stepbrother simply apologize to her before he locked his eyes on the book.

“Rachel, get out of my house right now,” Kurt said with far more calm in his voice than he expected.

“Kurt, you’re back early,” Rachel was obviously surprised to see him. She made no move to get off the couch and follow his orders. If she didn’t get her ass out the door within the next minute Kurt was going to show her the true definition of the word bitch-slap.

“Rachel, get out,” he repeated.

“What’s your problem Kurt?” Rachel asked him, finally getting off the couch so she could stand in front of him. Kurt saw Finn watching them with wide eyes, his cheek still glaring red from Rachel’s slap. “Did you need the living room? We can move our study session to Finn’s bedroom if you’d like. Of course we would have to keep the door open so your parents don’t think we were doing anything wrong.”

Kurt snorted, actually snorted, at her comments. “Rachel, you just hit their son across the face for no reason. You’ll be lucky if they don’t at the very least call your dads and tell them what a little psycho they raised.”

“Well, honestly,” Rachel just rolled her eyes at him and Kurt had to restrain himself from physically removing her from his house, “it’s hardly my fault that Finn has difficulty paying attention during our study sessions. I’m trying to keep his grades up Kurt, so when we graduate he’s not stuck in Ohio while I’m having the time of my life in New York City. Obviously it’s for his own good.”

“It’s abuse,” Kurt never appreciated his growth spurt more now that he could stand right in front of Rachel and look down at her. “I’ve helped Finn study and I’ve never hit him. Now get out of my house before I call the police and have you arrested.”

Rachel looked behind her, probably to see if Finn was going to defend her but Kurt stepped around her to block her view. He wasn’t going to let her flash those hurt eyes at his gullible stepbrother. Finn might not realize it was just as wrong for girls to hit boys as it was when boys hit girls but Kurt knew and it wasn’t going to happen again.

“I don’t see those hideous shoes moving,” he snapped. He just crossed his arms and glared at her until she left in a huff. The door slammed behind her but Kurt was more concerned with how Finn was going to react. “Hello Finn Hudson.”

“Hey Bro,” Kurt resisted the urge to roll his eyes this one time. At least Finn hadn’t called him his little brother, even though Kurt was three months older than Finn.

“Do you still need help studying?” he asked, taking a seat on the couch next to his stepbrother. If Finn wasn’t going to bring up what happened with Rachel then he wouldn’t either. He’d let Carole talk to him later.

“It’s okay,” Finn just shook his head and started to gather his books. Kurt wanted to reach out to stop him but he didn’t. “Thanks for making Rachel leave. She gets a little too intense sometimes. I‘ll make it up to her tomorrow.”

“Finn, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Kurt said, trying to emphasize the sentiment as much as he could. The last thing he wanted was for Finn to believe Rachel’s abuse was something he deserved. He couldn’t wait for Carole to get home to talk to Finn; he had to at least start the conversation now. He couldn’t let it go. “Finn, it’s not okay for anyone, boy or girl, to hit you. You get bored and don’t pay attention in class but none of your teachers hit you, right?” he waited for Finn to nod before he continued. “That’s because they would get fired. Just because Rachel’s a teenager and a girl doesn’t mean she’s not the one with the problem.”

Kurt didn’t think he’d ever been as mad as he was at this moment. Rachel continued to find ways to hurt his stepbrother. Sure, Kurt knew Finn should have come clean with the truth but he also knew that Rachel didn’t care about the lie. All she cared about was Santana and since that was something she was never going to get over, Kurt thought it was good Finn had broken up with her. Her getting too emotional so she felt her only option was to hurt Finn was a little too close to abuse for Kurt and the earlier slap just sealed it.

“Next time you need to study, I’ll help you,” Kurt told Finn as his stepbrother went back to gathering up his books.

 

Hours later, after their parents had been informed and Carole had had an angry call with one of the Mr Berrys , Kurt was lying in bed with too many thoughts running through his head to sleep. Finn had been subjected to a long conversation with Carole, with his dad adding his thoughts occasionally, and now his stepbrother understood why it was wrong for Rachel to hit him. At least Kurt hoped Finn fully understood.

But that wasn’t what was worrying Kurt. He was worrying about all those similarities between himself and Rachel, and if those similarities meant he was also capable of hurting someone he was supposed to love. He loved Blaine, there was no denying it, and even though Blaine didn’t feel the same way, it did nothing to change how Kurt felt. Blaine could be extremely frustrating at times but Kurt couldn’t imagine ever being so angry with him that he would actually strike him across the face.

Were the hands that he carefully kept moisturized to ensure their softness capable of leaving a red mark on someone’s cheek? Could his perfectly manicured nails leave a scratch one someone’s face? Kurt shuddered at the ideas of the damage he could cause to someone else if he tried.

Since the three of them started hanging out, Mercedes had joked more than a few times about how sometimes it seemed he and Rachel were one soul in two bodies. If Rachel’s half of their soul was capable of hurting someone she loved, was his half also capable? Kurt didn’t even want to consider that possibility. He wasn’t like Rachel. He wasn’t.


End file.
